Ah, Valentine’s day. A day where we celebrate romance and love. Winged cupids fly through the air delivering arrows of amore to couples running through fields of flowers to the lilting tones of violins…
Oh fuck this shit. You’re looking to get laid.
For vampires in the Buffyverse, Halloween is amateur night. For couples who are truly in love, Valentine’s Day must truly be the same. This holiday is for those who need an excuse to bribe their insignificant other. If the roses are large enough, the chocolates are fancy enough, and the diamonds are large enough, you are assured no objections when you bend them over the couch and say “I’m gonna do you, bitch.”
Now this attitude may seem a bit crude. I think I’m just irritated by the need for some people to disguise their perfectly natural lust in cutesy hearts and flowers. There is no shame in admitting sometimes you don’t want Mr. Right, you want Mr. Right Now. Part of the problem could be that kind of naked sexual desire comes off as animalistic and ugly. Which can explain wrapping it up in the cutesy hearts and flowers. What people don’t bother to see is that sex can be beautiful and artistic.
For example, look at the picture here. A beautiful woman, confident in her nudity. She isn’t brazen, but the playing with the stem of the flowers does give subtle suggestion. This image is from one of Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab’s Limited Editions for Valentine’s Day, Ode to Aphrodite. All the perfumes in this range are named for the various titles and epithets given to the goddess of love. PothÃ´n MÃªtÃªr, represented by the picture here, translate to Mother of Desire. The perfume reflects this with the sweetness of caramel and red berries but an undertone of spice from benzoin and Balsam of Peru hints at erotic possibilities.
Shunga covered a variety of sexual partners and positions to satisfy their audience. In a society where communal bathing was common, the couples were usually clothed to add to the exotic nature as well draw the eye to the naughty bits that were exposed. The artistic and technical quality of the shunga was on a par with other woodcuts since many artists made both erotic and non-erotic pictures.
The perfumes in this range have… interesting titles. The translations of the shunga titles leave little to the imagination. You can wear the light pulpy scent of Tissue, a mix of sake and apricot with Manners Among Men And Women In The Red Light District, and the spice and honey sweet scent of Giant Vulva. Yes, Giant Vulva. If you wish to be a bit more discreet, there’s Flowering Chrysanthemums, But as you can see from the picture below, there is more blossoming than what’s in the garden.
If you’re wondering about the image covering the naughty bit, don’t ask. The full picture broke Widge. And he is a stronger man than you.