The Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense has been protecting America and the world from arcane and occult threats for sixty-five years. Wherever it’s savage werewolves, cryptozoological horrors, or power-mad occultists, the B.P.R.D. has been there bumping back decisively against those who bump in the night. While the Bureau has been successful in its efforts, it has been looking into improving their public image. Having a reformed demon with a stone right hand as your top agent would even give Don Draper a run for his money. With Moneygeddonâ„¢ hurting its regular funding sources, The B.P.R.D. has been looking into alternate revenue streams. Enter Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab, the premiere perfume firm. They have a well known reputation for its fragrances inspired by both far-flung flights of fancy and dark descents of decadence. Their artisans work just as well with ancient myths as well as modern storytelling.
A collaboration between these two unusual organizations was truly fated to occur. So following in the footsteps of Lewis Carroll, H. P. Lovecraft, and Neil Gaiman, the B.P.R.D. is now the subject of a B.P.A.L. perfume collection.
- Hellboy‘s is quite representative of him with the astringency of a good aftershave, the sweetness of a Snickers Bar, the tang of brimstone, and the muskiness of a cat. Don’t worry, the muskiness in the perfume is not equivalent to the number of cats Hellboy owns.
- Liz Sherman, pyrokinetic and girlfriend to Hellboy, represents her dual nature. Her femininity is embodied by the vanilla and floral scents in the mix–while her strength as a B.R.P.D. agent and her firestarter abilities comes through with tones of smoke and leather.
- Abe Sapien, a strange being at home in water and well as dry land. His telepathic skills, as well as his intellect and combat prowess, make him an invaluable asset. His scent is obviously based on aquatic musks, but the juniper adds an undertone of masculinity.
- Trevor Bruttenholm is a legend in mystic circles. He founded the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense, he raised Hellboy to be the upstanding man he is today, and has defeated more supernatural evil than you’ve had hot dinners. The main fragrance is a classic men’s cologne worthy of a British gentleman and scholar. But the smell of ancient tomes and exotic incense reminds you that he was an occult scholar.
While Plague of Frogs is not based on a person, its sweet swampiness is commemorative of the latest major threat consisting of giant frogs, the demon Sadu-Hem and the mad monk Rasputin.
But it was the perfume based on of the Bureau’s greatest adversaries, Kroenen, that left me a little confused. Not the perfume itself, which is an intriguing blend of myrrh and labdanum as well as a heavy dose of leather. I was curious as to why this was created. I was informed that the unique condition of Lieutenant Colonel Kroenen along his fondness for skin tight leather appeals to certain types of fetishists. I think the less said about that the better.