Who Is Your God Now?

First, watch this:

Direct link for the feedreaders.

However, college students are a superstitious and cowardly lot. I speak as a man who was once one and then evolved. What Coke didn't tell you is that the experiment backfired shortly thereafter. If you start giving students free sugary caffeinated drinks, then free pizza, then free sandwiches, then you know what comes next. That's right...

The students began worshipping it like a god. When Coke panicked and pulled the "magic" out of the machine, the students, despondent, kept returning and giving it coins. Then dollars. Then they tried giving it food through the slot. Then the obvious next step was to sacrifice some freshmen to it. We lost communication with the college campus shortly thereafter.

So if this magic machine shows up at your campus: by the time that third bottle slams into the slot, you had better be packing your bags.

Found via AdFreak.