Life used to be simpler. More innocent. Less fraught with pitfalls. But these days, nothing is simple. For example, remember passing notes in class? They used to be on paper. You folded it up, you sent it on its way and it got there with even more surety than the Postal Service. Now, there's texting, sexting, Facebooking, Twittering, and instead of just "Do You Like Me?", kids are either sending full on Survey Monkey surveys or using forms that have passed (presumably) some form of legal review. Even having a crush on somebody requires an attorney. Crazy.
Anyway, we have a version of a form a kid had prepared in order to keep himself out of trouble. Read it and weep.
(Suggested by Angela W.)