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The Oatmeal on Nikola Tesla

By Wolven - posted 05.14.12 @ 10:16 pm
David Bowie is Tesla

David Bowie, standing in for Tesla. He too has Wizard Eyes.

Thanks to The Oatmeal, the world now knows that Nikola Tesla had what the kids at "Adventure Time!" aptly termed Stanky Old Wizard Eyes*.

And, really, is that surprising? The man was a Ghat Danged LIGHTNING WIZARD. In an age when people were still using the fart stank residue from oil wells to light their homes, Nikola Tesla created wireless electrical transmission and used it in his house. He showed off his ability to create ball lightning to his friend Mark Twain. And then...!

I mean... Just... WHAT THE HELL, people?!

I tell you this, for free: If I had a time machine, the first thing I'd do is go forward in time, dig up Tesla's corpse from the monument at which I'll have it buried, then I'd go back in time to the moment of Tesla's "death." I'd swap out his corpse for him, and bring him back to the present, where Modern-Day medical tech--much of which owes its existence to him--could revive and nurse him back to health. Just so he could SEE it, you know? Just so he could take it all in, and understand how much we rely on even the smallest of his works, and so he could do maybe ONE last thing with that mind of his.

That's what I'd use a time machine for. Yes.

Just Go read the comic. I can almost guarantee you'll learn something new, and even if you don't, it's an hilarious and touching tribute to one of the most amazing minds the world has ever known.


*Explained:

Direct link for the feedreaders.

Read More About:

Wolven is a philosopher, essayist, blogger, and interdisciplinarian (or as some would have it, "dilettante"). Here at Need Coffee, he works on exploring some of the weirdest intersections of pop-culture, academia, occult systems, and whatever else flees across the scary dark forest of his mind. He can be found on Twitter as well as many other places, but you can only get to those by howling the proper phrases into a laptop under the light of the half-moon. Wolven has written 38 posts. See them all here.

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A Mob Numbering 5
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    1. 

    So in other words, 'Vincent and the Doctor'.

    Did Telsa even think up some giant mecha robots? If he didn't, we need to show him some Gundam.

    Comment by ScottC — May 15, 2012 @ 12:04 am

    2. 

    You, my friend, need to read The Five Fists Of Science, because that is already on my itinerary.

    http://www.amazon.com/Five-Fists-Science-Matt-Fraction/dp/1582406057

    Comment by Wolven — May 15, 2012 @ 12:26 am

    3. 

    Tesla invented a rifle to write his name on Mars. Mecha? He don't need no stinkin' mecha.
    *grin*

    Comment by Nebulous — May 16, 2012 @ 9:53 pm

    4. 

    I mean, really, the man is the reason we have the idea of a Mad Scientist, at all.

    See? We owe him So Much.

    Comment by Wolven — May 16, 2012 @ 10:19 pm

    5. 

    Proof that Edison is an asshole:

    From the entry 'Edisonade' from The Encyclopedia of Fantastic Victoriana

    "And the Edisonades were among among the more morally reprehensible works of fiction of the 19th century, on a par with the dime novels the Confederacy published to glorify slavery."

    Comment by ScottC — May 16, 2012 @ 11:49 pm

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