The Oatmeal on Nikola Tesla

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David Bowie is Tesla

David Bowie, standing in for Tesla. He too has Wizard Eyes.

Thanks to The Oatmeal, the world now knows that Nikola Tesla had what the kids at “Adventure Time!” aptly termed Stanky Old Wizard Eyes*.

And, really, is that surprising? The man was a Ghat Danged LIGHTNING WIZARD. In an age when people were still using the fart stank residue from oil wells to light their homes, Nikola Tesla created wireless electrical transmission and used it in his house. He showed off his ability to create ball lightning to his friend Mark Twain. And then…!

I mean… Just… WHAT THE HELL, people?!

I tell you this, for free: If I had a time machine, the first thing I’d do is go forward in time, dig up Tesla’s corpse from the monument at which I’ll have it buried, then I’d go back in time to the moment of Tesla’s “death.” I’d swap out his corpse for him, and bring him back to the present, where Modern-Day medical tech–much of which owes its existence to him–could revive and nurse him back to health. Just so he could SEE it, you know? Just so he could take it all in, and understand how much we rely on even the smallest of his works, and so he could do maybe ONE last thing with that mind of his.

That’s what I’d use a time machine for. Yes.

Just Go read the comic. I can almost guarantee you’ll learn something new, and even if you don’t, it’s an hilarious and touching tribute to one of the most amazing minds the world has ever known.
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*Explained:

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Wolven

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