Benedict Cumberbatch from Star Trek: Into Darkness

You want to stare at me like a piece of meat, do you? So...shall we begin?

Over the course of the action-explodo-thon of Star Trek Into Darkness, there is a shot of Alice Eve in her underwear. I didn't mind it, partly because it was a brief blip in a film that I was enjoying the momentum of, and partly because I own a penis. But apparently, there has been some kerfuffle about this--and in J.J. Abrams' appearance on Conan (shown after the jump), he explains what his thought process was. And, you know, penis or not (though for the record: there is one), I can see where he could have been going for that and it was a beat that just didn't quite work in that way.

But yeah, he would have saved himself a ton of trouble if he had just left the shower scene in. All will be explained:

Regardless, I don't want to wade into the whole "Alice Eve underwear bad, Cumberbatch shower good" conflict that a lot of women are working their way through right now. What I do want to address is something I've noticed about people who did not like the film, scantily dressed people or not. It seems that a lot of them--not all, mind you, but a lot of them--are old school Trek fans (not even hardcore, just old school).

So in the interests of equal time for both Star Trek Prime and Star Trek II: Trek Harder, I give you this:

Ricardo Montalban shirtless

You're welcome.