Needcoffee.com - Ten Years of Insomnia: 1998-2008!
Vacation in a Bottle: Chill-N - Drink Review
Posted on 08.25.08 by Widge @ 12:58 pm
Vacation in a Bottle

While I am a stimulant junkie, there are times when even I want to relax. And I have been, on occasion, known to drink something that doesn't have caffeine in it. Like milk. And...you know. Milk. But I do like trying new drinks, especially when they sound as nice as "Vacation in a Bottle." It's pomegranate berry flavored, it says, so that is nice. It promises a "wave of relaxation," which is also nice. And while the fact that it has no caffeine makes it sound like something that I would burst into flames if I ever tried, I would say that you're thinking about it the wrong way. Vacations take time. So if you can have the equivalent of a vacation in the time it takes to drink something--how could that not appeal to a stimulant junkie?

Granted, I was worried that the thing might lose its mojo, considering that it arrived in cans. But if you consider it, "Vacation in a Can" just doesn't have the same elegant sound to it.

Popping the top, you get the whiff of the berry-ness, which is pleasant. The first sip is very pleasant--there's more berry flavor there than full on pom, but that's pleasant. It's extremely mild, mellow even. Then...the wave of relaxation is drowned by a wave of chemical aftertaste. And that's the sucralose undertow, folks.

[[ Review continues ]]

Categorized as: Drinks and Reviews
Comments: 3 Comments





Surge Returns in New Eel Flavor
Posted on 08.10.08 by Widge @ 7:55 pm
Unagi Nobori: Surging Eel

Whoops, no, my mistake. The name of the drink is Surging Eel and actually has nothing to do with our dearly departed Surge. In Japanese it's Unagi Nobori. And it doesn't just taste like eel, it is eel. "Contains extracts from the head and bones of the serpentine fish." On one hand, I eat eel with my sushi, so that's not so odd. On the other hand, the concept of drinking an eel smoothie just doesn't, you know, thrill me.

But because this is supposed to "boost stamina" that makes it, technically, an energy drink. And dammit, that's my jurisdiction. So I have a responsibility.

Therefore I declare I will reimburse the costs if anyone wants to send me, from Japan, a bottle of this stuff. (As long as they send it via the slow, inexpensive transport instead of, you know, FedExing to me. Let's not crazy here.) Anyway, I will review it on the site. Contact me for details. I would hit up Japan Tobacco for a sample but I have a sneaking suspicion that since it's probably never going to show up stateside, they would derive no benefit from a review here, even though we do have readers in Japan.

I declare also that I will also give a dollar to the first person who posts to YouTube a film of themselves taking a swig of Surging Eel and saying into the camera, "That's a moray!"

Found via BevBlog. Image from Tokyo Mango.

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Categorized as: Drinks
Comments: 1 Comment



Deep Throat Energy Drink - Review
Posted on 08.08.08 by Widge @ 4:45 am
Deep Throat Energy Drink

Could this be the world's first energy drink inspired directly by porn? I don't know. But yes, for those who missed ScottC's introductory 101 lecture on naughtiness last fall, Deep Throat was and is a 1972 porn film starring Linda Lovelace and is probably one of the most (or at least admitted to by most) widely known porn titles in pop culture, even if the folks don't know the plot. Or won't admit to knowing it. You know what I mean. But yes, apparently for last year's 35th anniversary of the film's release, an energy drink was born.

Let's get to the taste first, then we can investigate the thrust of the product. Well. You know what I mean. The taste is nothing spectacular. It's very similar to Red Bull. But a bit milder and a bit smoother. As far as the energy bit goes, it's about average there as well. The caffeine content isn't listed on the can, although it does involve guarana extract as well. Bear in mind that this is me who's writing this review, so it does take a bit of a bazooka blast of caffeine at times to get me to notice anything. That's not to say that this is a negative review--not in the least. It was actually pretty pleasant to drink. But it's certainly not innovative--but sometimes you just want a known quantity. Especially if you've been trying around and all the innovations keep fizzling out.

[[ Review continues ]]

Categorized as: Drinks and Reviews
Comments: None



Venom Energy Drink: Black Mamba and Mojave Rattler - Review
Posted on 08.02.08 by Widge @ 4:02 am
Black Mamba and Mojave Rattler: Venom Energy Drink

So when I heard that Dr. Pepper was going to get into the energy drink arena, I thought I should give these things a try. I was sent a sample of both the Black Mamba and the Mojave Rattler variations. Basically, as I understand it, the Black Mamba comes with half sugar and glucose and then half is the dreaded sucralose, then you have Mojave Rattler, which is just glucose and sucralose.

The bottles are pretty cool, although they can mislead: I thought for some reason that the Mojave Rattler, being purple, was grape-flavored. For all I know it is grape-flavored, just overpowered by the sucralose, but we'll get to that in a minute. The bottles are aluminum and feel sturdier than the larger resealable bottle/can/battery that Jolt comes in. And as result, when they are cold they are nice and cold.

Beyond that, we go straight into the taste. And I will give Dr. Pepper this: the Black Mamba, as much as I hate sucralose, is tolerable. When I unscrewed the top off I could just smell the fake sugar. And it's not like I had my nose up to the bottle. It just, boom, was loose and in the air around me. And I'm not kidding. So I was worried this was all about to go south. What happens is that it's got a rough taste to it, which reminds me a bit of Cocaine Energy Drink (but without the burn), then the sucralose kicks in, but just before it's about to overwhelm you and make you saw off your own tongue with a butter knife lest that taste linger--the real sugar seems to kick in and return you to sane sweetness. I drank a big gulp to begin with and my eyes watered afterwards. I was able to drink this and actually finish the bottle, which is a testament to its taste. If you actually can stand sucralose on its own, then you'll dig the hell out of this.

[[ Review continues ]]

Categorized as: Drinks and Reviews
Comments: 4 Comments



Hide Valuables Where No One Would Think to Look For Them
Posted on 08.02.08 by Widge @ 2:06 am

This is actually pretty ingenious: hacking a Pepsi bottle to hide valuables inside it: since Pepsi tastes like stale Coke, nobody would dream of ever pulling that bottle out of the fridge.

Direct link for the feedreaders.

Found via Lifehacker.

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Categorized as: Drinks
Comments: None



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