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08.09.08 by Widge @ 7:11 pm So we've been looking around for a snazzy new table to have in the TechnoCave's attached compound's library. Here's some stuff that we've found. Used to be that a SunTable was something you sacrificed someone to the sun god of your choice on. But that was a more enlightened age. These days they won't let you sacrifice somebody to a sun god unless that god has a permit and is properly taxed. Total pain in the ass. However--today the SunTable can still be a good thing. Check out this:  How brilliant is that? Instead of dealing with the Dayball, push this thing outside let it soak up some battery juice, drag it back inside after the sun goes down, work on your laptop with it! Excellent! And when you get pissed off that your Windows Goddamn Vista has decided that your copy isn't legitimate even though it is and helpfully tries to lock you out of your own goddamn computer, you can switch into Vista Mode:  $2200. Spring-loading it so your laptop gains air is extra. Found via Cribcandy. More after the break. Categorized as: Gear
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08.06.08 by Widge @ 2:06 am  Showing yet again that nothing exceeds like excess, ladies and gents, I present the Colosso--a watch that costs $550K. Yes, that was a K. It comes with a tiny Earth that rotates "for local or GMT time." We agree with Watchismo Times: this is truly the watch of a Bond villain. Although, honestly, for that price it needs to come not just with a white cat, but with entire SPECTRE organization as a feature. In fact, they should be able to pop out of the watch at will. I mean, for Christ's sake, $550K will fill an average minivan's gas tank! So I started to wonder: that's pretty pricey...but what's the most expensive watch--certainly that's the SRP for that watch, but there must be more expensive ones than that. Forbes helped me out in answering that question. Here's the $5 million and a skoche watch from 1989 that is the second most expensive on their list. And honestly, nearly quadrupling the price on the Colosso is good enough for me. Make sure you flip through the rest of that slideshow. It's impressive in its ridiculousness. But that $5 million watch? No wrist rockets. To hell with that crap. And the $11 million watch is called the Supercomplication. For $11 million goddamn dollars, it better be the Supereasyasgreasedhell. What kind of fool pays that money for something complicated? Yes, I know--that was rhetorical. Colosso sent in by Artist in Residence Rox. Categorized as: Gear
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07.20.08 by Widge @ 5:03 pm This is a knife that once inserted injects supercooled gas into the target, designed to freeze and rupture internal organs. Wait, here, they explain it in cooler language than I can: This weapon injects a freezing cold ball of compressed gas, approximately the size of a basketball, at 800psi nearly instantly. The effects of this injection will drop many of the world's largest land predators. They designed this thing to work on land or in the water. So watch as they test this thing against one of the most vicious land predators. Direct link for the feedreaders. So what have we learned? That the Wasp Knife is effective against watermelons but only one at a time. If you get cornered by a sarong of watermelons (the technical term for a pack of watermelons) then you're fucked and won't have time to reload. The second watermelon here was obviously sedated, otherwise it would have had the guy's face off before he could get the new canister in place. Categorized as: Gear
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07.16.08 by Widge @ 11:40 pm  So a couple of years ago we were graced with Sumo and Otto, the giant beanbag pillow and accompanying ottoman, that you could use to lounge about. Now it turns out that Sumo has gone after their beanbags with the comfy stick and beaten them severely. Not only have they walloped them so hard that they're softer now, the poor things have swollen and are ginormous. Allow me to explain. This new version is called the SumoSac. And I wrote that entire first paragraph knowing that it would take you that long to get all of the obvious jokes out of your mind, and you know they're obvious if I'm letting you tell them to yourself and not going there. Categorized as: Gear and Reviews
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07.09.08 by Widge @ 5:29 am  Okay, so everybody keeps sending me this zombie, which apparently is for sale at Toscano. Toscano is my second-favorite catalog after Hammacher Schlemmer. Because 99% of the stuff in there is just so over the top. I will say that I will make heavy use of them when I finally get my Safari Room. Anyway, while I appreciate the concept of a lawn zombie, apart from the grey complexion of this individual, there's nothing particularly zombie about him. He could just as well have been a guy living in a black and white subterranean world who just clawed his way to the surface and is freaked to find that either the world above is in color or that Legend Films got a hold of his home. Granted, "zombie" is a much simpler, Occam-friendly solution. But I dunno, he looks a lot like me when I greet the Dayball on those rare occasions I leave the Technocave. Maybe I'm too close to this. Found via Boing Boing and the many people who sent it over. Categorized as: Gear
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