Planet 51 (2009) – Movie Review

Planet 51 movie poster

Written by: Joe Stillman
Directed by: Jorge Blanco, Javier Abad & Marcos Martinez
Starring: Dwayne Johnson, Justin Long, Jessica Biel, Gary Oldman, Seann William Scott, John Cleese

My Advice: Not just no, but hell no.

It’s a lovely place to build a home and raise a family. There’s classic music, there’s good wholesome values and as long as you can deal with alien dogs that pee acid, you’re fine. Of course, what ruins everything is the arrival of one of those pesky humans in the form of Chuck Baker (Johnson), who is no doubt, being an alien, the vanguard of an alien force. Baker must be found and turned over to the government before it’s too late. The only person…um, yeah, sure, person…standing in the way is Lem (Long), a kid who has dreams of working at the local observatory.

The shame is that I was perfectly willing to go along with this quirky alien-to-us world. The alien dog peeing acid thing was amusing (the last scatalogical joke in the film to be funny, in fact), the animation and character designs were decent enough and the setup was funny. Then the actual plot of the film started. The astronaut shows up and quickly sets back–about ten years–the opinion of NASA in the minds of those with single digit ages. Now I know that astronauts probably have some ego–that’s to be expected when you’re chosen to be part of a small elite cadre that the U.S. government will spend billions on to light a fire under your ass and send you off-planet–but I certainly hope they’re not the smug, cowardly, self-centered pricks that Baker makes us think they are. I’d ask Buzz Aldrin but he might punch me.

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By | 2017-09-24T22:56:58+00:00 November 28th, 2009|Movie Reviews|3 Comments

Win Just Add Water on DVD!

Just Add Water DVD Cover Art

Just Add Water is a comedy about Dylan Walsh (from Nip/Tuck) as a guy who decides to take back his life. Among those along for the ride are Jonah Hill (Superbad), Justin Long (Live Free or Die Hard) and Danny DeVito. We happen to have three copies of it here which you can win, if you are so inclined. Want to give it a shot? Enter below…

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By | 2017-09-24T23:14:41+00:00 August 4th, 2008|Contests|2 Comments

Win Strange Wilderness!

Strange Wilderness DVD Cover Art

What happens when you get a dumb comedy surrounding a nature program? You get Strange Wilderness, starring Steve Zahn, Justin Long, Ashley Scott, Jonah Hill and others. Would you trust that crew to go after Bigfoot? Me neither. But that’s what they do. I guess it was either that or work on a sequel to Sahara. So.

We have three copies here, courtesy of Paramount. You want to win one? Go for it.

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By | 2017-09-24T23:18:16+00:00 June 4th, 2008|Contests|1 Comment

Live Free or Die Hard – 27 Second Review

Bruce Willis in Live Free or Die Hard

Written by: Mark Bomback
Directed by: Len Wiseman
Starring: Bruce Willis, Timothy Olyphant, Justin Long, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Kevin Smith

Review: You know you have a fantastic movie when you see cameos from not only actors, but other movies as well. And you know you have a downright kick-ASS movie when I, Siege, never once think, “God, would they blow something up already!?”

Not. Even. Once.

Time: 15 seconds.
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By | 2017-09-24T23:30:27+00:00 June 28th, 2007|27 Seconds, Reviews|0 Comments

Herbie Fully Loaded (2005) – DVD Review

Herbie Fully Loaded DVD cover art

Film:
DVD:

Written by Thomas Lennon, Ben Garant, Alfred Gough and Miles Millar, based on characters by Gordon Buford
Directed by Angela Robinson
Starring Lindsay Lohan, Michael Keaton, Matt Dillon, Breckin Meyer, Justin Long

Features:

  • Director Commentary
  • Bloopers
  • Deleted Scenes
  • Alternate Title Opening
  • A Day at the Races
  • Breaking the Rules: The Stunts from Herbie: Fully Loaded
  • Lindsay Lohan Music Video: “First”

Released by: Disney Home Entertainment
Rating: G
Region: 1
Anamorphic: Yes

My Advice: Rent it

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By | 2017-09-24T23:32:12+00:00 April 27th, 2007|DVD, Reviews|0 Comments

Accepted (2006) – 27 Second Review

Accepted movie poster

Written by: Adam Cooper, Bill Collage & Mark Perez
Directed by: Steve Pink
Starring: Justin Long, Jonah Hill, Adam Herschman, Columbus Short, Maria Thayer, Lewis Black, Blake Lively

Review: The funniest thing about this movie isn’t the one-liners, or Lewis Black’s scathing rants, but the fact that I saw it in a theater reeking of pubescence from the two hundred or so high schoolers in attendance, at least 70% of whom will actually believe that this is what college will be like. Damn kids.

Time: 14 seconds.

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By | 2017-09-24T23:41:05+00:00 August 27th, 2006|Movies, Reviews|0 Comments

Dodgeball (2004) – DVD Review

Dodgeball DVD

Film:
DVD:

Written and Directed by Rawson Marshall Thurber
Starring Vince Vaughn, Ben Stiller, Christine Taylor, Rip Torn, Justin Long, Stephen Root, Joel Moore, Chris Williams, Alan Tudyk, Jason Bateman, and Hank Azaria

Features:

  • Running audio commentary with actors Stiller &Vaughn and writer/director Thurber
  • Deleted/extended scenes and alternate ending with optional commentary by Thurber
  • DVD-ROM Content: Dodgeball Screenplay
  • Gag reel

Released by: Fox Home Entertainment
Rating: PG-13
Region: 1
Anamorphic: Yes.

My Advice: At the very least, rent it…

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By | 2017-09-24T23:48:51+00:00 March 1st, 2006|DVD Reviews|0 Comments