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Flamin’ Hot Mountain Dew – Drink Review

A bottle of Flamin' Hot Mountain Dew, which has been partially drunk. Which is what you have to be in order to enjoy this stuff.

Straight out of the “Who the hell was asking for this?” area of product R&D comes this…Mountain Dew “with a blast of heat and citrus.” I’m always amused and curious about monstrosities such as these. I can’t help but purchase these things. My therapist and I have discussed it more than once. After I bought this, I noted that on the left side of the logo, next to what looks like Kool-Aid Teen (who’s a juvenile arsonist), there was a thing that said: “CAUTION: Flamin’ Hot.” It was only as I started to type this up I saw the word I had missed: TASTE. So they’re not cautioning me against drinking this because it will be really hot, they’re cautioning me up front about the taste they’ve already marketed to me. “I know you’ve agreed to this by buying a bottle of this stuff, but we wanted an extra warning on here so there would be no question regarding what a follow-up bad decision you’re about to make by actually trying it.”

One last note before I take the plunge. This is a very, very red drink. I know we’ve all seen various red drinks, especially in our respective childhoods, but the red coloring of this I find to be profound.

Its smell? Extra citrusy Mountain Dew. 

Its taste? Mountain Dew that tastes slightly citrusier than usual. At first there didn’t seem to be any semblance of heat going on at all, but after a good swig I can taste what feels like it’s trying to mimic the mouth-feel remnants of something hot. Not even necessarily tasty-hot-spicy, but hot like the masochists really enjoy. It’s there for a few seconds and then it sort of wafts away for maybe a half a minute before it’s gone. To be honest, if I hadn’t been told ahead of time this was supposed to be “Flamin’ Hot,” I might not even have noticed.

There’s no sign of what they put in here to try and achieve the effect they were going for. Maybe it’s hidden in “Natural Flavors”? 

So what’s happened? Well, perhaps this is all the spicy they think most consumers are ready for. (Possible.) Maybe the regular ingredients of Mountain Dew were enough to eat away the spiciness inside the bottle before I opened it. (Not unlikely.) Or maybe the Flamin’ Hot caution message was to prepare me for disappointment. Granted, I was not disappointed. The only way it defied my expectations is in being moderately drinkable. Not sure who I would recommend this for, since it will do nothing for heat lovers and Mountain Dew lovers probably already have what is essentially this flavor in a regular bottle of Mountain Dew. Oh well.