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“English, base knave, dost thou speak it?!”

Having recently encouraged the bastardization of our mother tongue in the service of LOLPoetry, it’s only fitting that we leap to the other end of the spectrum to set the cosmic balance to rights. Work is afoot to render the entirety of Quentin Tarantino’s masterpiece Pulp Fiction into Shakespearean iambic pentameter. LJ user ceruleanst, the mad bastard, started the insanity with an innocuous LJ post, but the idea has now exploded into a full-on wiki soliciting for additional scene-writing. Here’s a little snippet to whet your appetite:

Julius: Speak ‘What’ again! Thou cur, cry ‘What’ again!
I dare thee utter ‘What’ again but once!
I dare thee twice and spit upon thy name!
Now, paint for me a portraiture in words,
If thou hast any in thy head but ‘What’,
Of Marsellus Wallace!
Brett: He is dark.
Julius: Aye, and what more?
Brett: His head is shaven bald.
Julius: Hath he the semblance of a harlot?
Brett: What?
(JULIUS strikes with his blade and BRETT cries out)
Julius: Hath he the semblance of a harlot?
Brett: Nay!

If I had any head for scansion, I’d be all over this, but my talent for pentameter is limited in the extreme. So I leave it to you lot. Fly, monkeys! Fly!

Found via MeFi.

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