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Stuff You Need to Know, Thursday, December 4, 2008

The Flintstones

Some sites want to spend the whole time berating you with long drawn out stories about what’s going on. Screw that. We all have better things to do. Enjoy.

  • Marco Pennette, scribe of the light but satisfying Samantha Who? has got a couple of projects you might need to know about. One is an hour-long drama called The Romeos, telling the story of a four man band who become huge stars–and it tells it from the present day looking back to their time in the 60s when they first got started. Why do you care? Because composer Jeff Marks (Avenue Q) is on board. What else is he working on? The book for the Flintstones musical. What can we expect from it?

    Pennette’s script will rely on contemporary issues: Wilma, for example, mulls leaving Fred because he still acts too much like a caveman and hasn’t adapted to more modern ways. Barney and Betty tackle fertility issues before deciding to adopt. Musical will also tackle global warming — but in this case, as “The Flintstones” takes place before the ice age, the characters will confront “global cooling.”

    Wow. That is…exactly what the world wants from Flintstones: The Musical. No. Honestly. We’ve been crying out for somebody to take a fun animated series and turn it into some godawful non-funny “contemporary issues”-ridden piece of shit. Well done. Tonys all around. Source: Variety.

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  • As we mentioned previously, they’re trying to remake Captain Blood. John Brownlow (scribe on Sylvia, the Gwyneth Paltrow-starring Plath biopic) has been tapped to scribe it. Source: Hollywood Reporter.
  • Craig T. Nelson is going to do three episodes of CSI: NY. This, no doubt, while he’s waiting to get tapped for Incredibles 2. Source: Hollywood Reporter. Source: Hollywood Reporter.
  • So what is Johnny Depp up to? First up, his production company is named “Infinitum Nihil,” which is not only brilliant, but sounds like a Clive Barker villain. He’s nabbed In the Hand of Dante, which covers the competion of The Divine Comedy at the hands of Dante and a modern day story about somebody trying to prove that a manuscript really is the original one by Dante. The modern guy is who Depp is slated to play. The Rum Diary will star Depp as Hunter S. Thompson–yes, again–with Bruce Robinson (Withnail & I) helming and scribing. Production on that starts in March. And that’s been in development hell–not with Depp I don’t believe–but for forever. He’s also on tap to play Barnabas in a new Dark Shadows movie. So he’s a little busy, the poor guy. Where are they going to fit in Pirates 4, I wonder? Source: Variety.
  • Well, if you like Eleventh Hour, rejoice. Five more episodes have been ordered. Source: Hollywood Reporter.
  • Lastly, we remind you humbly that for all your holiday online shopping needs, you can probably find it through Needcoffee. Because we figure if you’re going to buy the stuff anyway, do it here–we get kickbacks and it helps support the site. We thank you.
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    1 comment

    • On the Flintstones: I laughed, and then the gravity of it hit me. Fertility issues. In the Flintstones. And I wonder why I laughed at all.