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Your Monday Morning Mental Sorbet: Car Commercials So Bad You’ll Want to Bodyslam a Penguin

Minnie Trucks

Each week we try to start you off right–or wrong, as the case may be–with videos so mind deadening that they will make the rest of your week easier to bear. It’s just another service we provide.

And when I had these handed to me, I said: car commercials? Really? Surely there is a limit to how bad car commercials can be. Can they truly be worthy of the Mental Sorbet name?

In a word…yes. Should I be worried that the number one thing that crosses my mind when I see this first commercial coming up after the jump is… “Is that Victor Garber on the left in a screwed up aspect ratio?” In a word…probably.

Direct link for the feedreaders.

Also, let me just say: I am from the southeastern United States. And I barely can understand that guy on the right. Seriously.

Now you might be looking at your penguin friend and you don’t feel the need for violence. This next video will remedy that. So if you do have a penguin nearby, send him out for coffee.

Direct link for the feedreaders.

That Peso Little joke is so terrible that Machete 2 is going to be about Danny Trejo tracking down the people who made that commercial.

And lastly, in all fairness, and to further numb you, we go way back to show that bad car commercials have a long history. Even Ed Wood was known to have made some in the 1950s. Sample one of his to start off here–and then the vid does not stop. We apologize in advance:

Direct link for the feedreaders.

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