Gatorade Fierce is now Br Ing It?

Gatorade is trying to go EXXXTREME even beyond the EXXXTREME that they already had going. Which means they are now EXXXTRA EXXXTREME. They're taking their attitude to 11, in other words. Let's see what they have to say for themselves:

This new Gatorade attitude will be most visible through a total packaging redesign. For example, Gatorade® Thirst Quencher will put the letter G front and center along with the brand's iconic bolt. For Gatorade, G represents the heart, hustle, and soul of athleticism and will become a badge of pride for anyone who sweats, no matter where they're active.

It also means "General Audiences." Which represents Benji movies. I'm just saying. They're changing the names of their drinks as well--I think--the previous name is still up there on the container artwork. Anyway...

  • Gatorade Fierce® is now Bring Itâ„¢
  • Gatorade X-Factor® changes to Be Toughâ„¢
  • Gatorade AMâ„¢ is now called Shine Onâ„¢
  • Gatorade Rainâ„¢ becomes No Excusesâ„¢
"Gatorade understands different people have different wants – you can't speak to athletes and active people with a 'one size fits all' mentality," said Craig Horswill, senior research fellow, Gatorade Sports Science Institute.

Or a "name of the drink fits the bottle" mentality, apparently. As you can see on the bottle we have up there, these titles are so impressive and EXXXTRA EXXXTREME they come in a font size so big they can't fit properly on the bottle. I'm sure this just means they're going to roll out bigger 50 oz. drinks or something.

Anyway, the press release/story on BevNET says that they're rolling out the updated stuff later this year. I hope they hurry. They got two days left.

Now I don't want to give Gatorade a hard time. Well, okay, kinda. But the concept of Gatorade being "Fierce" is completely alien to me. I think they had found their groove with the black and white commercials in which the athletes had consumed so much Gatorade they were sweating it out of their bodies. In neon colors, no less. And granted, I'm not athletically inclined. More reclined or even declined as the case may be. So maybe among sports-types Gatorade is the shit and whipping out a bottle of it without announcing it is the equivalent of flicking open a switchblade...I have no idea. But around here, Gatorade is what you drink when you're feeling under the weather and you need to get liquids in you. That's about as badass as Gatorade gets.