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Stuff You Need to Know

Stuff: J.J. Abrams and the Puzzle Apartment

Widge
June 18, 2008
3 min read
Green Lantern Battery prop replica

Because some things you simply need to know. Here’s the day’s news in a quick digest form. Trust me, you lost nothing if somebody got cast in some film at 8am and you’re finding out about it now.

  • In more startling proof that the Law of Relative Development holds under continuous testing, Paramount snagged the rights to the magazine article we talked about previously, in which a New York apartment was turned into a walk-in puzzle. J.J. Abrams will be producing the film, thus ensuring that the apartment will be seen through jumpy POV camera and the ending poem in the wall will be made of smoke.
  • Blu-ray is expected to do $1B in sales this year, $2.5B next year. How many people have made the switch? Show of hands.
  • The Catholic Church is putting together the criteria for what they think constitutes good cinema. From the report: “Priest Marco Fibbi, a spokesman for the Diocese of Rome, said Wednesday that the church was working on a set of guidelines that will determine whether a film contains the ‘proper’ religious sentiment.” Meanwhile, the rest of the world is putting together criteria for what they think constitutes good religion. Top of the list? Not messing with altar boys.
  • Here’s Hasbro’s Cloverfield monster. Siege tells me it comes with ten parasites. Just like your high school.

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  • Immunotherapy is exciting: a guy was injected with his own immune cells and was able to fight off cancer. Obviously more studies are needed, because there’s not enough information to piss off somebody yet. In order to garner publicity through controversy, scientists are going to re-release the report except saying that the cure is diced kittens.
  • Film School Rejects have published a picture they’re saying is Thomas Jane as Jonah Hex. I’d watch that. He sure as hell deserves some sort of consolation after his Punisher movie turned into twelve miles of arse–not his fault.
  • Proving that sometimes props and replicas are better than the latest issues of the comic that spawned them…which isn’t saying much, since my ass is better than most post-Morrison JLA, DC Direct’s JLA Trophy Room props are kicking with much bass. If you have enough money to buy these, and haven’t donated some to me, then…well, I’m not sure what to say to that. Here’s the Green Lantern Battery Prop.
  • Nottingham turns the Robin Hood myth on its head, casting Russell Crowe as a noble Sheriff of Nottingham facing off against Robin Hood and vying for the love of Maid Marion, who it was announced will be played by Sienna Miller. Whereas Robin Hood uses bows and arrows, this version of the Sheriff will throw phones. Ridley Scott is to direct from behind a riot shield.
  • Portion sizes are bigger. The fog is getting thicker. And Leon’s getting laaaaarger.

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    4 comments

    • I’d love to see Catholic approved movies, almost as much as I like seeing their reaction to everything else. I wonder if they approve of Iron Man?

    • Well.I ust to be a catholic ,msny,msny moons ago.I don’t even think they’d approve Leave It To Beaver.
      I had the un-esteemed privilige of going to a Catholic boarding school for high school.They had a movie night every weekend – it was always something like The Ten Commandments . The only good thing at the school was the arts department ,had some fabulous classes~~but I always wondered when we put on a yearly play ,how the nuns saw that it was fit to have some of us dress like boys for male roles.
      All I can say is that it was a long time ago and what the catholic church decides to do is one of my least,farthest concerns at this point in my life.

    • We made the move to Blu-ray one year ago fathers day! As incredible as the format is, I wonder if the disc prices would be more realistic if the HD war had gone a bit longer. No regrets, just want lower disc prices at this point.