This is a how-to book waiting to happen: DIY Planner has an article about the folks you need to emulate: the Vikings. And I'm sure you would all run out and buy it...

Of course, they didn't live in modern-day Denmark, they lived in medieval Denmark, before the people there even knew their country was called Denmark. The frustration of having an unnamed country eventually drove the Vikings to put horned helmets on their heads, climb into unprotected and leaky boats, and attack anyone and everyone they could reach by sea in order to carry away anything that wasn't nailed down.

Very nice. And I would like to be addressed going forward as Widgett Fjordbuster, Eater of Ragged Souls. Read the whole thing. What's your Viking name?

Update: Bailey points out that there's already an online tool for determining your Viking name. Of course, I should have known. According to it, I'm "Vaði Backstabber." Eh, I like Fjordbuster better.